3 Reasons Why Getting Someone’s Name Right is Important
I’m slowly going through old boxes of stuff so my poor children won’t have to after I’m long gone. Some of you might have this aspiration too. It’s a slog.
Two nights ago, I was sifting through said items of stuff. Why did I keep that fake $500,000 bill encapsulated-in-plastic? More junk to recycling and the landfill (my apologies, dear Earth).
Then, I burst out laughing.
On a little piece of paper, my name was enshrined on some old magazine label: “Grosie Delve.” Believe me, there’s nothing that humbles one like having their name spelled…“Grosie.”
It harkened me back to a post I wrote many moons ago, What is the Sweetest and Most Important Sound?
You know what that sound is. Yes, it’s your name. Sure, it may feel a bit self-centered. But it’s because your name means something to you. It’s your key identifier.
Getting names right is a part of hospitality.
Feeling like you are known, cared for, and loved is a starting point on the journey toward generosity.
I recently heard someone on a podcast who felt welcomed and seen by the church she’s attending simply because she was called by name. It was that easy.
Your name is important. And it’s essential to pronounce and spell other people’s names correctly.
It’s hard. You don’t have to tell me. I apologize for my three names almost on a daily basis. Even though I’ve gotten used to it, it still bugs me a little when I see “Cecie,” “CeeCee,” “Cessie.” And don’t even get me started on that 11-letter last name of mine.
In my previous post, I wrote about three reasons why getting someone’s name right is so important:
1. It’s a way to show hospitality. Remembering someone’s name from one week to the next can be a “wow” moment for that person. “Hey! Someone noticed me.” “Someone bothered to spell my name correctly.”
2. People want to know they matter. They’re not trying to test you. People are usually forgiving. But you might imagine what they’re feeling when it’s the third or fourth time and you’re asking their name again? They might assume you haven’t taken the time to remember who they are.
3. It gives you the opportunity to develop a relationship. And that’s what being a part of a community is all about. Relationship. How can you be known if your name keeps being forgotten or mis-pronounced or mis-spelled? (My apologies to all the Jennies and Jeannies, all the Deannas and Deannes, all the Katherines and Kathleens, all the Jenns and Jennas. I sincerely hate bungling your names.)
True confession: I am terrible at remembering names. Here’s a fun 5-minute video that might help you, like I hope it will help me. Included in all the fun tips, remember this key point: “be mindful and be aware” of who you are talking to. To remember a name, focus on the person.
If someone had focused, let alone proof-read that label before sending it out, “Grosie Delve” might never have seen the light of day. But then again, I wouldn’t have had my big belly-laugh either. So, thank you unknown data entry person. You made my day. You inspired me.
Let me do better for the next person I meet.
Cesie Delve Scheuermann (pronounced “CC Delv Sherman,” yes, really) is a Stewardship Consultant for the OR-ID Annual Conference. She is also a Senior Ministry Strategist with Horizons Stewardship. For 25 years, while working as a volunteer and part-time consultant, she has helped raise over three million dollars for numerous churches and non-profit organizations. She wants you to know that this is not an appropriate way to remember names.
You can reach Cesie at inspiringgenerosity@gmail.com, at CesieScheuermann.com, or at cesieds@horizons.net. Want to schedule a meeting? She’s got you covered!
Schedule a meeting now.
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